Leading by Example
I started taking Taekwondo classes at the tender age of 23. Actually, it was July 21st, one week before my 24th birthday. There was a little TKD program at the local community center. I had always wanted to study martial arts, never really had the time/money/opportunity to do so as a kid, so I jumped in.
I'm standing in the back row (which is where the brand-spankin' new white belts stand), and I distinctly remember watching the students in the front row. They were all green belts. One of them, Mike Reidhammer, had the most awesome side kicks. Clean, precise, powerful, targeted. And I told myself, "I don't care if I ever get a black belt, I want to be just like that green belt in the front row."
Mike didn't know me from Adam at the time, but he was leading. He was leading by example. I watched Mike constantly. Probably even more than I watched my instructor. I mean, I had no aspirations at the time to actually be a black belt. I wanted to be like Mike Reidhammer. To me, that was an attainable goal.
Fast-forward about 35 years, and I'm 6th Dan, and I believe Master Reidhammer is 7th Dan now. Last I heard, he was still teaching a program up in Grand Forks, ND area. One of my favorite people in the world.
When I've taught classes, I've run across students who tell me they have no desire to ever be a "leader". They are content to stay in the background, don't ever want to lead class, or anything. They just want to "show up and work out". My response to this is usually pretty much the same. Two things: One, that's pretty selfish. Two, you don't get a choice.
We don't get to choose whether or not we're going to be a leader. We are ALWAYS going to be a leader, whether we want to be or not. Because somebody, somewhere, is watching, and will take their cues, learn their lessons, gain new insights, simply by watching. There was a time in my life when I really tried hard to blend into the woodwork and not be noticed. I know...I can hear you now...a lot of my friends are laughing their heads off. Seriously, I just wanted to show up, do my thing, and go, without any concern about "leading" or "being an example" or even being noticed. I had gotten to the point where I was too focused on that, and was always concerned about what I was doing, how I looked doing it, how I was being perceived by others...the pressure really was getting to me. The end result was that my performance suffered horribly. I simply couldn't get my head wrapped around what I was supposed to be doing, because I was so focused on looking over my shoulder to see if I "measured up". I realized that all that inward focus was taking away from my ability to actually do what I needed to do to the best of my abilities. So I made a conscious decision to simply be the best "me" I could be, and everything else would take care of itself.
Do I tend to be a "leader"? Well, my nature is to not sit by when something needs done. My nature is to jump in headfirst with both feet, and if necessary, figure out how to swim while I'm doing it. I'm usually one of the first to volunteer, but I do that primarily because that's how I learn. I know a lot of people who don't do that. They don't want the attention, they don't want to be singled out, they prefer to hang back in the shadows. Well, to those people I tell you: you are a Leader whether you want to be or not. There is always some "white belt" in the back row watching you, learning from you. As I tell my green and blue belts...you have a responsibility to yourself to spend this time at green and blue ranks cleaning up your technique, making it as crisp and powerful as you can. Our students spend a lot of time at green and blue belt. Sometimes a year or more. Because that's where the growth occurs. And because those are the students our white belts are watching. They're not watching the black belts and masters out in front leading class. They're watching the green and blue belts to see what they're doing. If the green and blue belts are putzing around in class, goofing off, throwing sloppy techniques, don't know their forms, have poor targeting, then those white belts are going to see that as "acceptable", and will incorporate that into their taekwondo skill set.
All of us lead by example. As parents, we always have little eyes watching us, learning from us. "Do as I say, not as I do" is a horrible way to parent and a horrible way to lead. As people in our society, how do our actions line up with our words? Can we say that our actions and words line up? Would others say that about us?
Bottom line is this: You don't have to like it, but you are going to be a leader today. Because there's always a white belt watching you.
My two cents worth today.
I'm standing in the back row (which is where the brand-spankin' new white belts stand), and I distinctly remember watching the students in the front row. They were all green belts. One of them, Mike Reidhammer, had the most awesome side kicks. Clean, precise, powerful, targeted. And I told myself, "I don't care if I ever get a black belt, I want to be just like that green belt in the front row."
Mike didn't know me from Adam at the time, but he was leading. He was leading by example. I watched Mike constantly. Probably even more than I watched my instructor. I mean, I had no aspirations at the time to actually be a black belt. I wanted to be like Mike Reidhammer. To me, that was an attainable goal.
Fast-forward about 35 years, and I'm 6th Dan, and I believe Master Reidhammer is 7th Dan now. Last I heard, he was still teaching a program up in Grand Forks, ND area. One of my favorite people in the world.
When I've taught classes, I've run across students who tell me they have no desire to ever be a "leader". They are content to stay in the background, don't ever want to lead class, or anything. They just want to "show up and work out". My response to this is usually pretty much the same. Two things: One, that's pretty selfish. Two, you don't get a choice.
We don't get to choose whether or not we're going to be a leader. We are ALWAYS going to be a leader, whether we want to be or not. Because somebody, somewhere, is watching, and will take their cues, learn their lessons, gain new insights, simply by watching. There was a time in my life when I really tried hard to blend into the woodwork and not be noticed. I know...I can hear you now...a lot of my friends are laughing their heads off. Seriously, I just wanted to show up, do my thing, and go, without any concern about "leading" or "being an example" or even being noticed. I had gotten to the point where I was too focused on that, and was always concerned about what I was doing, how I looked doing it, how I was being perceived by others...the pressure really was getting to me. The end result was that my performance suffered horribly. I simply couldn't get my head wrapped around what I was supposed to be doing, because I was so focused on looking over my shoulder to see if I "measured up". I realized that all that inward focus was taking away from my ability to actually do what I needed to do to the best of my abilities. So I made a conscious decision to simply be the best "me" I could be, and everything else would take care of itself.
Do I tend to be a "leader"? Well, my nature is to not sit by when something needs done. My nature is to jump in headfirst with both feet, and if necessary, figure out how to swim while I'm doing it. I'm usually one of the first to volunteer, but I do that primarily because that's how I learn. I know a lot of people who don't do that. They don't want the attention, they don't want to be singled out, they prefer to hang back in the shadows. Well, to those people I tell you: you are a Leader whether you want to be or not. There is always some "white belt" in the back row watching you, learning from you. As I tell my green and blue belts...you have a responsibility to yourself to spend this time at green and blue ranks cleaning up your technique, making it as crisp and powerful as you can. Our students spend a lot of time at green and blue belt. Sometimes a year or more. Because that's where the growth occurs. And because those are the students our white belts are watching. They're not watching the black belts and masters out in front leading class. They're watching the green and blue belts to see what they're doing. If the green and blue belts are putzing around in class, goofing off, throwing sloppy techniques, don't know their forms, have poor targeting, then those white belts are going to see that as "acceptable", and will incorporate that into their taekwondo skill set.
All of us lead by example. As parents, we always have little eyes watching us, learning from us. "Do as I say, not as I do" is a horrible way to parent and a horrible way to lead. As people in our society, how do our actions line up with our words? Can we say that our actions and words line up? Would others say that about us?
Bottom line is this: You don't have to like it, but you are going to be a leader today. Because there's always a white belt watching you.
My two cents worth today.
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