But I don't WANNA change...

In your mind, see if you can channel that inner 4-year-old. Dig deep, stomp your feet a little, plant them solidly, dig your fists into your hips, frown, pout, and in your best little-kid whine, say it out loud..."But I don't WANNA!"
There! Now don't you feel better? Doesn't that solve all your problems? Doesn't that make it all go away, and make it smooth sailing?
Whattaya mean, "no"? That didn't work for you? Seriously? It should have worked...maybe you didn't do it right. Try it again. Feet in a strong, defiant stance, hands on the hips, mean face, ready..."but I don't WANNA!"
What? STILL nothing? I don't get it. That used to work when we were kids. We used to be able to firmly take a stand and announce to the world (translate: our parents) that we simply were not going to do something. And it always turned out the way we...uh...wait a minute. Now that I think about it...
Maybe it was different in your household. It always worked for YOU didn't it?
no? You mean, you still ended up having to clean your room, make your bed, pick up your toys, help with the chores around the house, set the table, feed the dog/cat/goldfish/tarantula, stop beating your brother/sister...
Odd. Pitching a fit, throwing a tantrum...that never seemed to work out so well for the fit-pitcher in our household when I was growing up. And it NEVER got the results that said fit-pitcher was hoping for. But, hello slow-learner, that never seemed to deter me or my brothers from trying the whole "I don't wanna" routine. In retrospect, I can only shake my head (or "smh", for those who are into the whole texting shorthand thingy), and wonder a couple things. First, how did I ever survive long enough to reach adulthood? But more importantly, how did I think I was going to get a different result if I was applying the same behavior?
"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results," is widely attributed to Einstein. Well, you don't have to be an Einstein to figure out that if you have exactly the same "inputs", you're going to get the same "outputs". Plainly put, if I put sand between two pieces of bread, I may end up with a sandwich (see what I did there?), but it's not going to be edible, no matter how many times I try it. Oh sure, I can dress it up with some ketchup, a bit of lettuce, maybe a tomato, even some of that really neat chipotle-mayo. But in the end, all that becomes is sand with some salad. It's still eating sand. The only way to NOT eat sand is...wait for it...don't put sand into the sandwich in the first place.
Now, I know what you're saying...you're saying, "but Lar, I have ALWAYS put sand in my sandwich. I've done it that way since I was a kid." To wit I would reply, "so...you LIKE to eat sand?" If you are a relatively sane person, I would expect you to respond with , "No...not particularly..." 
My rejoinder would then be, "Then why do you continue to put sand between two pieces of bread?"

I replaced my phone last night. Not out of a huge necessity. I didn't drop or break or lose my other one, but I could tell a couple of the pixels in the screen were going out. Not a huge deal, but I could see that it was probably going to start living up to Murphy's Law of Cell Phones: "Your phone won't die until you are in a place where you are simply unable to replace it and/or recover any of the life-blood that you have stored on said phone." So, it was more of a preemptive strike on my part. The bad part? Now I'm going through the agony of re-learning how to use a phone. No, young padawan, all cell phones are NOT alike. They make them all different just so they can mess with me, the consumer. At least, that's where my head was last night.
This morning? I realized that the cell phone is a lot like my life. You see, there were things about my old cell phone I didn't like. There were some limitations, some inconveniences, and some things that downright made it hard to use. One huge issue was that when I would call folks, other people had a hard time hearing me. So I would just talk louder. Which made my voice sound like Charlie Brown's teacher, only louder. But I continued to use said phone for over 2 years, hoping each time I called, the sound quality would improve.

Well, there are parts of my life that are just like this whole cell phone thing. There are parts of my life where I am simply not satisfied with the results I'm getting, or the path I'm on, or the way I do things, or the words that come out of my mouth, or...pick one. Yet what do I do, when I realize that I'm not satisfied with the results? I "try harder". I "dig deeper". I firmly resolve that the outcomes are going to be different. Then I continue to do exactly the same thing, over and over and over...and get frustrated when the results don't change.
Great moment of truth in my life? When I finally figured out that if I want an outcome to change, I -- ME -- this dude right here -- absolutely MUST change at least ONE of the factors in the inputs. I will have to change at least ONE of my behaviors. Otherwise...I am doomed to achieving exactly the same output every single time.
So there you have it...I can choose not to change. I can stomp my feet, put my hands on my hips, pout, whine...and continue to reap the unsatisfactory results of my actions/inactions. Or, I can step out in faith, get out of my comfort zone, get out of myself, and do something different, and achieve the change in myself that will lead to growth.
It's time to get out of the rut. You know what a rut is, don't you?  It's simply a grave with the ends knocked out.
Nobody said "change" was easy. If it was easy, everybody would do it.
My two cents worth today.

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